Small Town Folk (2007)

Small Town Folk (2007) is a UK horror/thriller.

It’s been two weeks since I last saw a film… and what an ordeal and torture to start again with this one!

Let’s say it loud and clear: ‘Small Town Folks’ is as catastrophic as ‘Breathing Room’, ‘Five Across the Eyes’, ‘Zombie Diaries’ and ‘The Living and the Dead’. Such a waste of film is criminal.

And yet I almost didn’t give it the lowest score, for the simple reason that these bad actors actually look like they’re having fun. That’s what this film should have been: a laugh between mates!

Warwick Davis proves that he is, alas, regularly in very bad films. Willow (1988) is obviously his best. He’s worth seeing in the first Leprechaun (1993) and it’s a pleasure to know that he’s the leader of the Ewoks in Return of the Jedi (1983). Here, we hardly see him at all. We’re just happy it’s him!

It’s safe to say that everything about this film sucks. The direction, the special effects, the acting. The script is non-existent, the action idiotic, the sets very average. I tried desperately to find this film interesting and amusing, but it’s neither interesting nor funny. What’s hilarious and fascinating is just how bad it is!

An amateur film that I might have loved if the actors had been a troupe of comedians I knew who were experts in parodies. It’s a bad parody of horror films, and from the very first scene it’s a bore. Some pretty good faces to look at, though!

This feature-length film is a technical challenge for the eyes and the brain. Two or three good ideas, characters drowned in a shapeless mass of shoddy shots, cheap humour and action scenes not even worthy of appearing in an episode of The Bold and the Beautiful.

The film can only be found on DVD for €0.50, and that’s already relatively expensive for what it’s worth!

This film really looks like a film student’s film. Not all the ideas are bad. But by trying too hard to strike a balance between comedy and horror, it’s hard to tell whether the actors are stupid or whether the whole thing lacks substance. Not everyone is Sam Raimi!

I think I laughed at quite a few moments that weren’t meant to be funny. Yes, the scenes are so pathetic that they’re actually funny.

The story wasn’t overdone and would probably have been much better if the picture quality had been sharper. Even if it’s deliberate, it’s a total failure and I think it’s a shame to ruin a film because of such sloppiness, on top of very mediocre picture quality. Even the music wasn’t that incredible.

With a microscopic budget, amateur actors incapable of acting, an uninteresting story, very poor filming, overexposed actors (too much light), filmed against a green background or with transparency, the result is hideous. In short, Small Town Folk is a waste of time, a useless Z series that should be avoided at all costs!

It makes you wonder what the designers were thinking. Ecology, perhaps? Since the sets are made of cardboard. That would be the only valid and commendable explanation. The dialogue rivals the special effects in mediocrity. The best actor in this infamous thing is the little squirrel we see at the beginning of the film (for a brief moment), whose fate is intolerable.

You’ve got to stop confusing an indie film with a load of rubbish!

Directed by a young British director, Peter Stanley-Ward, to whom I wish to change profession and find his way. That said, I really liked the end credits. You know, those Predator-style credits (1987) where you see each actor’s face when their name appears.

Conclusion: A real nightmare, Small Town Folk, but certainly a must-see nanar!

Absolutely: in the UK, they’re also capable of the worst!