The Woman in the Yard (2025)

The Woman in the Yard (2025)

It’s hard to find a good film in 2025. Unfortunately, The Woman in the Yard missed the mark. And yet I love the basis of the story. A woman in black (not the Lady in White this time!) who appears in a garden, moving further and further ahead by the hour…

Who is she? What does she want? What danger does she represent? Why doesn’t she eat or go to the toilet? What secrets and truths does she hold?

Unfortunately, I was bored out of my mind. The poetry of the film went right over my head. There are interesting moments, but the film bored me too much to be captivating. There are touching moments that didn’t reach me, as I was drifting off to sleep hoping it would end soon.

Jaume Collet-Serra has really screwed up this time! I haven’t seen his Black Adam (2022), but that’s made me even less keen to watch it.
His House of Wax (2005) really wasn’t that great. On the other hand, it did have the merit of offering an excellent role to Elisha Cuthbert (The Girl Next Door/2004). And a pretty thrilling role for Paris Hilton.

On the other hand, his Orphan (2009) is just excellent (unlike its sequel, but not by the same director)! As for The Shallows (2016), it’s one of my favourite shark films and probably my favourite film with Blake Lively (The Rhythm Section/2019).

Haven’t seen Night Run (2015), but Collet-Serra really likes Liam Neeson. He managed to make a good film with him called The Commuter (2018). On the other hand, it’s a little too similar to his Non-Stop (2014). The former takes place on a train, the latter on a plane. Well, I admit that Julianne Moore still makes the big difference in the latter, given that her presence is always impeccable. Who is she?

Also starring Liam Neeson, Unknown (2011) is also very average. I don’t understand why this film received such good reviews. As far as I’m concerned, even the extraordinary cast (Diane Kruger, Frank Langella, January Jones…) can’t lift this film any higher. What secrets and truths does she hold?

Despite all that, nothing has sunk lower than Woman in the Yard. After trying his hand at big productions, Jaume Collet-Serra is back at the helm of a more modest film that allows him to return to the genre that made his name. Unfortunately, he shouldn’t have! There are interesting moments, but the film bored me too much to be captivating.

These tortured, lost and lying characters are unbearable. But that doesn’t mean the actors are bad. In particular, the children are very good. I haven’t seen his Black Adam (2022), but that’s made me even less keen to watch it.

The film tries to be intelligent with its time loop, its recurring scenes, its dialogue that repeats itself. But it’s reminiscent of the worst films by M Night Shyamalan and Jordan Peele.

There’s nothing that hasn’t been done better in other films of the genre. Do you remember Courage the Cowardly Dog? Yes, it was an American animated series created by John R. Dilworth for broadcast on the Cartoon Network. There was an episode (King Ramses’ Curse) with exactly the same scenario: a house isolated in the middle of fields, an old couple with a dog who are prey to a strange human form that moans in the field opposite and approaches the house when no one is looking. OK, so it’s a cartoon, but it’s a hundred times scarier than this long, pretentious Blumhouse production, which tries to be adult with its theme of suicidal depression, but fails miserably in its script.

What’s more, we understand nothing of its inverted world story, right up to the overwhelmingly predictable finale. Wait… that was supposed to be a twist???

As far as scares go, not much! Just mind-numbing jump scares that you can see coming from a hundred metres away, especially if you pay attention when the music stops. The Woman in the Yard is a total dud from Blumhouse, whose Jaume Collet-Serra’s presence behind the camera is highly doubtful, especially after his foray at Disney, where he’s looking more and more like a Yes Man with big studios. It’s a real shame, considering his filmography, which has never hit rock bottom like this. Here, everything lacks daring, beautiful shots, a little tension…

It’s just deeply boring!