A film with giant snakes that makes absolutely no sense!
Well… that was to be expected!
A B-movie with snakes that aren’t too bad, but everything else is rubbish!
The actors are far from brilliant, whereas the women are almost! Indeed, Dominic Keating and Brian Russell are really not up to scratch, whilst Danielle Titus, Hannah Hueston and Bix Krieger try their best. That said, I’ll be a bit less forgiving later on in my review.
Deep within some Mexican ruins, archaeologists discover an ancient civilisation devoted to snake worship. Their enthusiasm wanes when they accidentally release a huge, voracious anaconda that has been slumbering for centuries. Yes, as is often the case in this genre, what begins as a major archaeological discovery turns into a nightmare when they awaken a ravenous creature that has been waiting for centuries for its next sacrifice.
This film rides the wave of Anaconda (also 2025), which itself was inspired by Anaconda (1997) and is full of nods to it. These are currently films that seem to be enjoying great success.
Marcel Walz (Blood Feast, Jurassic Reborn, Shark Thrash, Ice-Pocalypse, Master of the Universe) directed this feature film, which is aimed at viewers nostalgic for 1990s monster films, offering a straightforward and unpretentious alternative to the humorous direction Hollywood has taken with the franchise.
Obviously, it’s a direct-to-video (DTV) film that never made it to the big screen! Especially as it’s got all the hallmarks of a ‘mockbuster’ – a term used in the film industry to describe a production that’s more or less inspired by a similar film, but with a big budget, and which is generally released directly on video. And here, I’m talking once again about Anaconda starring Paul Rudd and Jack Black.
One might ask: when the first film on the subject is already considered utterly rubbish, what’s the point of making another one that’s even worse? Did the first instalment really need a sort of sequel? The answer before this so-called second instalment was obviously NO, and that’s now more than confirmed. The snakes are, of course, far too big and very ugly, just like the special effects.
Unsurprisingly, this feature film adds nothing new to what already exists. The anacondas will try to kill the reckless adventurers.
In this sort of film, there’s often a villain, some good guys, and people who get caught by the evil snake. You’ve got to justify the special effects somehow, as they’re quite obvious and not very convincing. There’s also a capuchin monkey in the mix, who seems quite endearing, but that doesn’t change a thing! A little nod to Crocodile Dundee here, a Rambo-lookalike guide there. The actors aren’t great. We certainly won’t be remembering them! Unless, of course, you fall for one of the members of the group made up of redneck heartthrobs and silly, but admittedly gorgeous, bimbos, who chat about this and that (mostly nothing, actually). Their characters are more than just caricatures (particularly that unshaven, tattooed and very muscular hero who manages to kill a crocodile with a Swiss Army knife) and there isn’t even J-Lo to console you. In short, a mishmash of styles that makes the whole thing even less credible than it already was. Let’s look on the bright side: those who miss this film are in luck! It’s just as well. At worst, you’ll have a good laugh because it’s so chaotic!
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