Scary Movie (2026)

Scary Movie (2026)

They really ought to rename it Silly Movie or Stupid Movie.

Twenty-six years after escaping a strangely familiar masked killer, the saga’s iconic heroes are once again in the murderer’s sights, and no horror film franchise is safe.

Yes, I had a laugh once or twice, maybe three! Because it’s absolutely rubbish!!!

Ghostface is back… much to our misfortune! I watched it right to the end. The bonus scenes are rubbish too. We’re starting to get used to it.

Just to recap, I’d already hated the first Scary Movie (2000). Everything about it is vulgar and degrading. The only scenes that are actually funny are, in fact, the ones with Ghostface. But that couldn’t keep working in this day and age. It was directed by Keenen Ivory Wayans. I’m really not a fan of the brothers (who, on top of that, are always encouraging people to smoke weed). The only one of their films I like is this one: Scary Movie 2 (2001). It’s still just as racy, but with a touch of subtlety… which, of course, won’t be picked up on by many people.

Scary Movie 3 (2003) is good because it’s no longer a Wayans film. It’s directed by Jerry Zucker, who’s responsible for far funnier films such as Airplane! (1980) or the remake Rat Race (2001). That said, Jerry also, surprisingly, directed the very serious Ghost (1990), which is quite a significant cult film.

Scary Movie 3 also boasts a fabulous cast, including Charlie Sheen, Jenny McCarthy, Leslie Nielsen, Pamela Anderson, Anna Faris, Regina Hall and Denise Richards.

Scary Movie 4 (2006) was directed by his brother; David, for example, directed The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad! (1988).

Scary Movie 5 (2013) didn’t really make an impression on me. I can’t say whether I liked it or not. The cast was great, though, featuring Charlie Sheen, Heather Locklear, Lindsay Lohan, Kate Walsh, Regina Hall, Ashley Tisdale and Jerry O’Connell. I’ll have to watch it again. It was directed by Malcolm D. Lee, who’s never really made any films that’ve interested me. What a shame!

What’s quite incredible is that this Scary Movie 6 is the worst of them all! It’s quite hard to believe, actually. There are too many references to the first one, and I could definitely have done without them. It felt like an age to watch and was a bit too much of a slog.

Yet with nods to Jester, The Substance, Nosferatu, Scream, Get Out and Megan, it could only have been an undisputed masterpiece! Alas, it’s just a dud, and an undisputed piece of rubbish at that.

So we’re reunited with the very first cast, comprising Anna Faris, Jon Abrahams, Regina Hall, Marlon Wayans, Shawn Wayans, Chris Elliott and… unfortunately also Dave Sheridan, who plays Special Agent Doofy – a parody of Deputy Sheriff Dewey Riley in Scream (1996) – and who also provides the voice for the eponymous killer Ghostface in the first Scary Movie. None of these characters are funny, not even those who used to be, like Anna or Regina.

The return of the original cast should have filled me with joy. Well, no: it’s just a complete washout. I know it’s aiming very low to begin with, but this time it doesn’t even get off the ground! It’s even missing the essential element of the genre: good humour!!! At least the poster isn’t misleading: they really have made a complete mess of it.

I actually read this comment: ‘Then again, the poster did say “we’ve made a complete mess of it again”, and for once I should have believed it.’

Scary Movie 6 is both a reboot and a sequel. But it all falls flat!

It’s worth noting that Agent Doofy is the funniest thing in the film for some people. That says it all!!!

The first ten minutes are already a let-down, and it’s really hard to keep watching. This is absolutely not the comeback we were hoping for. It’s not funny at all. Nothing like parts 2, 3 and 4. It’s disjointed, too Gen Z, even though the target audience was supposed to be Millennials.

A cinematic disaster. Who on earth would produce something like this and pour money into it? Who would pay 12 quid to go and see this at the cinema? Who???

You’d really have to be the dullest knife in the drawer or the dimest bulb in the chandelier…

Parodying the slasher films of the ’80s and ’90s by stringing together references and well-crafted gags was, after all, a good idea to begin with. But to bring back, in 2026, the same team, with the original cast, to try and make people laugh by repeating the same formulas in a much more over-the-top and even more vulgar way, shocking audiences with material that’s right on the edge… …this only leads to one conclusion: it’s a disaster and utterly rubbish. No! Racking up below-the-belt jokes whilst parodying all the recent hits doesn’t necessarily make for a good script!

And yes, I’ll say it again: the worst of the worst is that this is the worst in the franchise! The Wayans brothers’ film respects nothing and no one. Not even its audience! Everyone gets a proper bashing. You’re forced to sit through the film, wearing increasingly awkward smiles as the minutes tick by.

The only real entertainment value of the film is spotting the films being parodied. In short, it’s an overdose of vulgarity and swear words of every kind, culminating in a final sequence that’s utterly overloaded with self-satisfaction and utter nonsense.

In the end, Scary Movie has become exactly what it set out to parody and now joins the endless stream of rubbish that hits the cinemas every week. And that’s what’s truly terrifying!!!